Why Dogs Are the Greatest

Puppy Mollie, spring 2010

Mollie, spring 2013, in her trademark cocked-head pose

In case you don't know, I am the proud owner of a Moody-shepherd. What? You've never heard of one of those? Well, neither had I, before Mollie. In fact, I may have made up that breed... Mollie is a dog, but it's tough to name the exact breed because she has the traits of a couple. She has fur coloring and patterns like a Belgian Malinois with the face and webbed paws of a lab. For the longest time we thought she was just some kind of German Shepherd, and none of her vets knew what to make of her. We never sent in her DNA for testing because it's expensive, unnecessary, and less fun to know. We like the guessing part of her.

Today, at age 3 1/2, she weighs about 60 pounds. She stands about as tall as a lab and sports a big, friendly smile. She used to be a BUSY puppy who tore everything up and was too smart for her own good, but after turning 2, she mellowed out big time. She's so awesome that I decided to make a list of the reasons why she is great (which obviously translates to why dogs are the greatest). This is a good go-to list if you're considering adopting a dog or if you just love them and want to look at cute pictures.

Mollie, sharing in watching The Office's finale episode, CLEARLY respecting my space...

10. Mollie respects physical boundaries. I mean, she's a dog, so she's kind of annoying when she makes you pet her or shoves her freezing nose into your palm when it hangs off the bed, but she's not the type of dog who stands on top of you when you sit on the ground or tries to climb into your lap (usually). And if you tell her to go away, she will!

Hiking with my favorite girl! She loves the mountains as much as I do!

9. She keeps me company. Guess how fun it is to hang out at home for 11 hours a day while my husband works? It's actually really boring and really lonely, especially when going through fertility issues. Mollie will follow me around my house, wherever I go. Even if I'm just running to the bathroom, Mollie comes and curls up right outside of the door and waits for me to be done. She likes me and likes to be around me, and it makes me feel better knowing I have somebody around, even if it's "just" a dog.

Taking a shower with her dad since we don't have a tub

8. She listens. Did you know that Mollie taught herself the command "go to bed" on her own? She picked up from context clues that every night before Josh and I would go to bed (way back when she was about six months old) that we would stretch, turn off the TV, and say, "It's time for bed." One day, after Josh did that routine, we realized that Mollie went straight to her kennel. Laughing, we called her out and then told her to "go to bed," not exactly sure what she would do. We were completely amazed when she immediately returned to her kennel. She got crazy amounts of praise for that, and it quickly became a favorite trick to show our friends. Anyway, Mollie is super obedient, and I love it.

Mollie tolerating Bradley the Boxer, even though he's a wild, crazy, energetic puppy

7. Mollie is social. Have you ever been around a dog that just got along with everybody? That's Mollie. She smiles and makes friends with all different kinds of dogs and humans with ease. Because she's big (especially compared to little kids), little ones are typically timid with her, so she gently stands there or licks their hands. We had the daughter of a friend ask once why Mollie licked so nicely because she was so gentle. My niece and nephews love to take her by her leash and run her around their yard. She trots along so patiently and stops whenever they do. My 3-year-old nephew loves the idea of her but gets scared when he's got her leash, and she just stands there while he screams and runs away, his screams turning into laughter. She's kind of perfect.

 

Mollie, clearly loving being babied (note: extended claws to hold on better)

6. She's our baby substitute (for now). Remember how we've been trying for over 2 1/2 years to get pregnant and it hasn't even almost happened yet? There have been a lot of tears about that in our home. It's been a heartache that I would never wish on anyone. And having someone little who needs you when you're wrapped up in depression can sometimes help you snap out of it and remind you to think about somebody else (even if she's little and furry). Mollie fills the baby role in our home in many ways, and it's fun to baby her for now.

Livin' it up, ET style

5. Mollie's a conversation-starter. Know what people can relate to? Dogs. People who have and love dogs love to talk about what they love about them. Especially because of Mollie's obedience, lots of people ask us about our methods of training and what type of dog she is (since she's not a distinct breed). If you're wondering about training, we used Dan Sullivan's The Perfect Dog system, and it worked great for her. She hasn't had the training collar on in over two months, and she still listens nearly perfectly. Not everyone will agree with that method of training, but whatever. I see it as being a lot like parenting where different methods work for different types of children, and where it can be a touchy subject. Either way, it gets people talking, and we love making new friends.

Sunday nap style with the three amigos

4. She brings us together. Joshua and I have worked so hard to train Mollie to do her different tricks. I'm currently training her to close the door when she comes inside, and it's not easy. Whenever we master a trick, it's easy for Josh and I to look at each other with pride and recognize the hard work that went into training her. I think of this as kind of like parenting when you see your child apply the knowledge that you've taught it. So we have parental pride over our dog... whatever. We love her.

She's especially tough when in uniform

3. She alerts me to dangers. Ever been home alone and not heard when someone was at your door? I know I have! Whenever Mollie is inside with me, she barks anytime there's someone outside of our door. She doesn't do this in an annoying way, but she does it to alert me and to alert the "intruder" that she is there. It's pretty intimidating, and I wouldn't want to be the idiot who chose to cross her when she's in guard dog mode. Once when we lived in Provo, she alerted us when a gunshot victim had stumbled into the parking lot next to our house. Pretty crazy place, that Provo...

Just napping wherever she feels like it, since she's a dog

2. Mollie is way lower maintenance than a baby. She needs to be fed once or twice a day, her water dish needs to be filled every few days (we use a big bowl), and she needs to be let out to do her business every few hours. We walk her occasionally, but she gets tons of exercise playing outside with our landlords' bloodhound, Sweets. It's a pretty perfect setup. Also, if we need to leave, we don't have to find a babysitter for her (unless we'll be gone overnight), and it isn't illegal to lock her in a kennel, if needed.

 Accompanying me on a vacation to California's coast. She's so happy her shadow is smiling.

1. She gives me someone to love! It probably sounds dumb, but I have so much love in my heart, and sometimes I really just need to hug and kiss on someone. My husband isn't exactly the touchiest-feeliest kind of guy, so sometimes I need to love on someone else. Enter Mollie. Mollie loves my attention, and she even reciprocates it. And there's really nothing more satisfying than being away for a couple of days and having your pup cry in excitement to see you. Honestly, I love seeing Josh when I've been gone, but I get WAY more excited to love on Mollie when she's shaking with happiness. It's really the best feeling.

So, whether you already have a dog or you're thinking about getting one, consider these excellent reasons why they are so wonderful. Of course, there are many downsides to having dogs too, but the love and companionship you'll share will far outweigh any negatives. Sometimes I wonder if she's my guardian angel, as silly as that sounds. I love my Mollie, and I couldn't imagine how boring things would be without her.

Cuddling with her dad on the couch. I love that her ears are sticking up!

Because, honestly, who couldn't love that sweet face?

Do you agree with these ten reasons why dogs are the best? What do you think about dogs? Do you love them to death or think they're more trouble than they're worth?

Ten Amazing Beaches on Oahu

Okay folks, remember my Hawaii series? It's finally happening! I'm going to write all about Hawaii. Today's topic is about beaching. I'm going to tell you about ten of my very favorite beaches on Oahu (and why) in no particular order (because all of Oahu is amazing, and every beach is my favorite). Remember, I've lived on Oahu twice, and for only 3-4 months at a time during the summer months. I LOVE it there, but I'm definitely no expert. These beaches are just some of my personal favorites.

10. Iroquois Point. I am partial to this beach because it is the beach right by where I lived two years ago. It's located on the south end of the island in Ewa Beach. It was well within walking distance from our townhouse, and it had lots of great amenities. I love that there are volleyball nets, pergolas, and beach chairs all already on the beach. This beach isn't my favorite for swimming because of heavy rocks and debris in the water, but it is one of my favorites for the cool things you can see. Iroquois Point is in a unique location, at the mouth of Pearl Harbor, and submarines, jets, and commercial airplanes pass by on a regular basis. From this beach, you can watch planes land at Honolulu International Airport, and you can also find random creatures on the shore. One day, my sister-in-law Alex and I saw a seal swim right up on shore, take a short break, and then swim away again. This is a cool beach to visit if you get a chance. This is NOT located near a bus stop, despite what people may say. It's a 2.5 mile walk from the North Road stop.

9. Shark's Cove. People are going to tell you about places to go snorkeling in Hawaii, but if they tell you to go to Hanauma Bay and don't mention Shark's Cove, they don't know what they're talking about. (Spoiler Alert: Hanauma Bay is overcrowded with tourists and is where I saw my first dead body...) Shark's Cove is located on the north shore of the island in Pupukea near a grocery store and across the street from Shark's Cove Grill (which serves DELICIOUS food, by the way). Despite the ominous name, I've never seen sharks at this location. This is, however, the perfect place to see a variety of brightly colored fish. Some people even SCUBA here, but I'm still too chicken to try that. Get there early to avoid crowds. Shark's Cove is located on the bus line.

8. Waikiki Beach. Everybody goes to this beach. It's the one in all the movies. Waikiki beach actually reminds me a lot of The Strip in Las Vegas. It's shiny and beautiful from afar but raunchy and drunk once you get closer. If you must visit this beach, don't do it on a weekend. Honestly, every day is busy down here, but if you're visiting when it's not peak season, it shouldn't be too crowded. Normally, however, finding a place to put your towel is a chore. There are many amenities provided here, which is probably why tourists like it so much. You can rent a surf board, stand up paddle board, boogie board, or get lessons for any of them. This beach is also located across the street from many high-end stores, so you can go shopping when your slippers (flip-flops) break. If you're on the bus, Waikiki Beach has many stops (because it's such a long strip of beach), but if you wait until you're nearer to the zoo, you'll have an easier time finding a less crowded part of the beach.

7. Waimea Bay. This beach rocks for a myriad of reasons, but mostly because of its rock. There is literally a giant rock located in this placid bay, and it's crazy fun to jump from. I'm sure people get hurt jumping here, but I've never actually seen that happen (and I've been there and jumped several times). Rumor has it that during the winter the waves here are phenomenal and that this is the location of multiple surf competitions during the winter months. I haven't seen that for myself, but I have played at this beach many times during the summer. There's also an expensive hike you can take in the canyon behind this beach, if you'd like to see a waterfall and swim in fresh water. Some people like that, but I think the bay is the best part. Waimea Bay is on the bus line (and parking there is atrocious, so the bus is the way to go if you can).

6. Pipeline/Sunset Beach. These two go together because (as far as I know) they are next door to each other and are nearly indistinguishable from one another. This beach is located on the north shore, east of Shark's Cove, and is one of my favorites. Even during the summer, the waves here are crazy high and will pound you into the sand if you're not careful. Obviously, during the winter this is where many surf competitions happen because of the famously high waves. This beach is good for swimming during the summer (if you're careful) and is great for watching the sunset during any season. As cliche as it sounds, there's a likely chance you will hear a ukelele playing while you're on this beach, just because you're in Hawaii and that's how it goes. Pipeline/Sunset Beach is on the bus line.

5. Kailua. Kailua Beach is located on the east side of the island in a rich area and has some of the most gorgeous scenery I have ever seen. People often have weddings right on the beach here because of the beauty. The white sandy beaches and turquoise water are a perfect combination. I've only been here once or twice, but I'll never forget the beauty. I'm fairly positive Kailua Beach is not on the bus line.

4. Waimanalo. Don't worry, but this is where Alex and I saw a shark. I'm pretty sure it was just a little reef shark, but it was swimming in a wave behind us and I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't scared anyway! Waimanalo is located just south of Kailua and also offers lovely scenery. Lots of people do professional photos from this beach, and it is not located near the bus line (but it's totally worth the hike).

3. Electric Beach/Tracks Beach. It's usually locals who call this beach Tracks Beach and it's usually tourists who I've heard call it Electric Beach, but it is the same either way. This beach is located on the west side of the island, just north of Ko'olina, and is across the street from the electric plant. (You'll know the power plant when you see it.) There are train tracks that you have to cross to get to this beach, which is why it's sometimes called Tracks Beach. Pictures you take on this beach are really cool because of the dry mountains and the smoke stacks in the background. There is a pipe that leads from the electric plant out into the ocean, attracting all kinds of wildlife. This is a popular spot to see whales during their migration season in the winter months and porpoises (dolphins) year-round. Seals frequent this beach as well, and so do sea turtles. The swimming would be great at this beach because of the size of the waves, but there are lots of big rocks in the water, making swimming painful. Many people snorkel and SCUBA in this area, and there's rumor of a Tiger Shark who frequents this area, probably preying on the wildlife that's attracted to the hot water pipe. Be careful, as always! This beach is located on the bus line. If riding the bus, get off at the power plant.

2. Dillingham Airfield. This is the place to see turtles! There's a popular beach for turtles closer to Shark's Cove that is also great, but this one is secluded (because no one knows about it) and still full of turtles! Dillingham Airfield isn't exactly the beach's name, but the beach is located across the street from the airfield. This is where people skydive on Oahu, and the parking lot isn't super close to where you'll actually see the turtles. You have to hike east and travel across a field and hill to get to the right spot. But if you can find it, this beach is perfect for sitting on and watching turtles. Remember that sea turtles are protected and should never be touched. If you see one in the water or on the beach, make sure you give it space to do its own thing. Honestly, I don't think this beach is on the bus line, but I'm not sure. It's on the north shore of the island but is almost as far west as you can go before the road ends.

1. Pounders Beach. This is my favorite beach on the whole entire island, located in Laie on the northeast side of the island. The waves here are spectacular. This is the best place to body surf on the island (in my opinion). There isn't debris hitting your ankles, there are lots of other people there (but not too many, because it's on the north shore), and the area is gorgeous. My one complaint about my favorite beach is that I always seem to get stung by Portuguese man-of-wars while swimming here. A Portuguese man-of-war is kind of like a tiny dark blue jellyfish, and it has tentacles that sting you when they touch you. I hear that they can grow to be quite large, but the ones on Pounders Beach are typically small. In any case, they're painful and can ruin a beach day really quickly. If you scope out the beach ahead of time and check out the sand to see if there are any tiny jelly-filled-creatures, you'll be able to determine your chances of being stung (and they CAN sting you while on the beach, so tread lightly). As far as I know, the tentacles on the little guys aren't going to kill you or anything, but they leave red bumps where they touch you, and they manage to sting and itch at the same time. Your skin will feel hot (because it's been POISONED), but it goes away within a few hours to a couple of days. Other than the stupid man-of-wars, I think that Pounders Beach is the best beach in all of Oahu. There's even a bus stop right at the beach, so you don't have to walk far to see this cool place.

I hope you've enjoyed the first installation of my Hawaii Series. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't totally homesick for the island, but what can you do? Maybe the money fairy will visit me soon and I'll be able to visit again. My love affair with Hawaii is intense and will never end.

Have you visited an awesome beach you want to tell me about? Have you been to Oahu and seen another beach that should be on this list? Let me know in the comments, and I'll add others if I agree with you!

Forgetting about the Two-Week-Wait

Oh, friends, this is my favorite time of the month. This time of the month is so full of hope. It's so full of potential. Anything can happen, at this point. I've done everything I can to cook up a baby, and now I have a chance to relax and let it marinade in water and prenatals for the next couple of weeks while I wait for a missed period. Ah, this is the life. ;) If you would have told me five years ago that this would be my life, I would have laughed. I would have told you that I went to college for a reason and that I would surely have written a book at least by now. But alas, my book is still in the planning stages, and is turning into multiple books the more I look at it. My life is so transformed it's nearly unrecognizable from what it once was. But it's totally in a good way, and that's not the point today.

 

This time of the month is also my least favorite. I have zero control anymore. I can't try any harder to make a baby stick. I can't take any special medications or do any crazy exercises or anything else in hopes that a baby will head my way. I'm helpless. I'm staring at the calendar, praying, calculating due dates, and doing my very best yoga breathing in hopes that all of this positive energy will focus into my uterus and make some magic happen. I have a love/hate relationship with the infamous two-week-wait.

What's a two-week-wait, you say? Well, it's the weeks following ovulation when you can only wait to see that magnificent second line appear on a pregnancy test. Of course, you can't take the tests at this point, because it's far too early to detect any HCG anyway, and it wouldn't make any sense to be crushed when it's impossible to know anyway. So, we wait, vacillating between blind faith and the possibility of failure. It's a complicated dance.

If you're in my boat and need some suggestions to keep your mind off of the calendar during your two-week-wait, you're in luck! I've got several suggestions for you:

1. Travel. There's no easier way to lose track of time than to travel. The farther away, the better. If you can go off the grid and enjoy an electronics-free vacation, do it. You probably won't be harassed by well-meaning relatives and you'll get so lost in enjoying yourself that you won't have time to think about being stressed.

2. Media. If you're a reader like me, visit your local library and stock up. I can go through novels quickly, so I would probably invest in 10-15 books for this waiting period. If you're not a book lover, no worries! Find a series you love on Netflix and go crazy! I've been using this method for the past eight months, and I've seen some great shows. I personally loved Gossip Girl, Missing, Arrested Development, The Office, Parks & Recreation, How I Met Your Mother, New Girl, 30 Rock, and many others. I just started watching Breaking Bad tonight, and I'm already hooked after the first episode.

3. Grow something! Okay, this works for surviving infertility in general, but it definitely applies to this portion of it. Go plant a garden. Water it. Weed it, as needed. And watch that soil grow something. Fruits, vegetables, flowers, whatever, just plant it. You will be surprised at how therapeutic it is to remember that you can grow something, even if your body isn't where that something is growing. You'll feel more fertile and accomplished after a month of gardening than you'd think. Try it and find out!

4. Meditate. I am terrible at incorporating this one, but I've read from reputable sources that deep breathing boosts fertility. I took a semester-long Yoga course in 2010 and remember feeling so good after class each day. I'm going to start trying this one tonight when I go to bed. Deep breathing is so great anyway, as it clears your mind and supplies your brain with additional oxygen. It boosts your thinking and makes you feel better. If you're not sure how to do yoga breathing properly, look it up on YouTube, and I'm sure there are tutorial videos. If it's causing a loud sound from the back of your throat, you're probably doing it right.

5. Laugh. Do you have a friend who keeps you giggling all the time? Do you have a movie or TV show that always cracks you up? Now is a good time to revisit them. If you're laughing, you're happy. If you're happy, you aren't stressed out. And if you're anything like me, this two-week-wait sure can be stressful since you have no control anymore. Bring some humor into your life during this time. I promise you won't regret it.

That's all I've got for now, but if you need more ideas, let me know! I can help you out. With 2.5 years of this under my belt, I by no means consider myself a pro, but I'm happy to share what I do know. Do you have any additional ideas? Leave me a comment; I'd love to hear them!

Happy two-week-wait! And may the odds be ever in your favor!

How to Snag Mr. Right

Today for my May Challenge over at Story of My Life I'm going to teach you how to do something I'm good at. And, quite frankly, I think I'm pretty decent at finding a good husband. That's right! Today I'm going to let you in on the secret of how to find and marry Mr. Right. Single ladies everywhere, listen up! This post is for you.

1. Invest in yourself. True story. Graduate high school. Go to college. Figure out your spiritual beliefs. Get a gym membership. Develop interests and hobbies. Whether you love scrap booking, rock climbing, salsa dancing, or watching sci fi movies, let yourself do it and love it. And don't just have one hobby--have several that you genuinely enjoy. Learn about your hobbies. Commit to them. That way, when you go out and have a hard time striking up a conversation, you can impress your date with your computer hacking abilities or interesting facts about J. R. R. Tolkien. You can discuss that biology course you took two semesters ago or question those Nietzsche readings you had last week. Remember that Eleanor Roosevelt said: "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." Keep this in mind so that you can find your intellectual equal in a man. And keep that gym membership for when you need to work off your frustrations with males in the dating world.

2. Travel. I could go on for days about how awesome traveling is for every aspect of your life, but let's keep this relationship-based. When you travel, you develop a bigger sense of "normal." You understand that the Chinese food in America is completely different from the Chinese food in China. You know that racism can happen to any ethnicity and that there are ten times as many great people in the world as there are not-so-great people. You realize what's most important is the experience and that all you need for a month (or more) can totally fit into a suitcase. Travel gives you an open mind, a broader sense of culture, and a greater acceptance of new things. This can be intimidating to some guys, but you don't want to attract those ones anyway. Whether you keep your journeys stateside or you venture off into some unknown territory, make sure you travel.

3. Make a 5 year plan (that doesn't involve him). This might sound mean, but even if you're already dating someone, you should have a backup plan (that doesn't involve another guy). Your plan should be completely independent of your dating life. Whether you want to land your dream job, buy a house, or just survive college, you should have a plan for your future. Not only do guys love confident women who know what they want, but your future self will thank you for having a plan if Prince Charming doesn't show up during that time. Stock up your bank account for your big trip. Build up your credit for a new car. Get out of debt. Whatever you do, have a plan for your future.

4. Be social. Whether it's with a Bunco group, the girls from your book club, or a group of co-eds from your building, get out. Whether you're camping for the weekend, out to lunch with the ladies, or playing volleyball outside of your apartment building, go do it. You will have great experiences making friends and fun stories to tell while on your next date. You may meet your dreamboat while out, or you might just have a great time, but either way it's win-win. Don't neglect these friends who you meet during this time. These friends may last the rest of your life, so invest in them!

5. Go out with that guy. You know. The obnoxious guy from the back of the classroom who kind of makes you crazy. The one from your apartment building whom you seriously clash with. When he finally asks you out on the last day that he possibly can, say yes. You might be completely surprised by how sweet he is in a different setting. Your heart may melt at the way he interacts with your parents. If he makes you feel bad in any way, cut him loose. But at least give him a shot. He may be the one. And, in my opinion, any guy with the cajones to ask deserves a chance.

Remember, it's way easier to just marry ANY guy than to marry the RIGHT guy. It's easier to find a guy to marry than it is to find the man who will still make you see fireworks ten years later. Be patient. You want to marry a man who brings out your best self and who loves you just as you are. Never settle for someone who demeans you or makes you feel bad about yourself. Don't go with the loser who cheats on you or the guy who thinks it's funny to hurt you or overpower you. If NOBODY settled for those guys, maybe they would get the point that their behaviors are NEVER acceptable for ANYONE. You are an interesting, intelligent person who deserves a man who makes her feel like a princess. It's entirely possible that these suggestions won't make your one true love appear out of nowhere, but at least you'll have fun in the meantime. Remember that's what life's about.